fringo

This week I was asked to do a very important after-dinner speech. I said, 'Do you want me to be funny?' They said, 'No, just be yourself.'

A man was marooned on a desert island. One day a beautiful woman arrives in a wet suit. 'When did you last have a smoke?' she asks. 'Five years ago.' So she gets out a cigar and he smokes it. She unzips her wet suit a bit and says, 'When did you last have a drink?' He said, 'Five years ago.' So she gets out a bottle of Scotch and he has a drink. Then she unzips her wet suit a bit more and says, 'And when was the last time you played around?' looks at her in amazement and says: 'You're not telling me you've got a set of golf clubs in there?'

Two women were having lunch together, and discussing the merits of cosmetic surgery. The first woman said, "I need to be honest with you, I'm getting a boob job." The second woman responded, "Oh, that's nothing. I'm thinking of having my a**hole bleached!" "Whoa," replied the first woman. "I just can't picture your husband as a blonde!

No, not all. I got what you meant and you are probably correct but that's all we've got at the moment as a yardstick. I phoned a friend of mine in Manila on Saturday. Philippines with a population of 105 million but under 1,000 cases.probably demonstrates the lack of info in many countries. Huge differences in so called advanced/developed countries in Europe. I guess all it shows are the changes in countries reporting ( in which ever way they report) mostly Europe, USA, China, Japan and S. Korea. As I said in a post last week, however bad it looks now in Europe & USA, goodness knows what could happened in Africa and India and other countries without the same infrastructures as we have.

Probably not. I just found it interesting.

Visualization of coronavirus growth through March, with the U.S. jumping ahead at the end https://i.imgur.com/H2UaA6N.mp4

A bit of nostalgia....

Time to post a tune in the music thread then ?

Is this not past your curfew ? 😄

If you live in the Glasgow area I'd have thought unsold soap on shop shelves has never been a problem - EVER ?!? 😊

Not a bad team !

Very tenuous I know and just a laugh but this is for all you St Johnstone fans 😄 PS Go on listen to it. It'll make you all smile.

That'll be you for the next 24 hrs with none left ☺️

That still annoys me (trivial I know but...). I don't know why there's such a tiny limit (or any limit actually)