killiefaetheferry

Is that a... bib that you are wearing wee man? Please tell me you don’t have a Scotland dummy tit anaw?

Did he not claim that you shat it?

Oh yeah. Fuck you then and I hope you drink dirty Canadian water out the cup.

Aye, next season will obviously now be the earliest it’ll be done again.

Armstrong started for Southampton.

How’d you know it was an app then? 😘

Just waiting for him to post his Grindr profile. 😱

Was in Ottawa visiting a friend a few years ago. -35. Very strange kind of cold. Never been a nervous flyer but I was a wee bit concerned on the way home when there were guys climbing onto the wings of the plane to de-ice them! Took me until about my third drink to relax 🤭

Ride. Wid.

The guy is black, ffs.

Shots fired.

Did he get the first sentence reference? That was my favourite bit 🤓

Act happy then 🙄. It’s like giving your wife a present she doesn’t like. Nae pleasing some folk.

I hold in my hand a piece of paper. It is a Velentine’s card from DD to Wee Ramy. It reads, “Stand free. Wherever you may be. Even in Ottowa. Unless you are standing in poisoned water; in which case you should move sharpish. We both hate huns, let’s call a truce. You stop banging on about sellic like an old Jungle alkie and I’ll stop rag-dolling you with wind-ups that you bite at every time.” Problem solved. Next; the Middle East. Please send my Nobel Peace Prize to: Mr Killiefaetheferry, Broughty Ferry, Sorry, Barnhill, Scotland. Near Parkhead. The real football ground where plastics are always welcome to spend their maple 🍁 syrup pound 🇨🇦

Plastic withoot the plane fare. I feel your pain.