I took my daughter to the pub last night for the first time.
Bought her a lager but she didn’t like it so I drank it and bought her a cider. She didn’t like that either so I drank that too. I thought right, kids these days like shorts, so I bought her a whisky. Didn’t like it so I ended up drinking that too.
I was that pished when we left the pub I could hardly push the pram home.