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2 hours ago, Jersey Jim said:

In that pic you do 

7FF1864F-69BE-4C20-A5E4-3DB1080D621B.png

I see you are still after a ticket for the Austria game 🙄

I suppose the freckles are similar. And at least you had the courtesy to cut off her body to give the comparison a sliver of  realism. 

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1 hour ago, TDYER63 said:

I see you are still after a ticket for the Austria game 🙄

I suppose the freckles are similar. And at least you had the courtesy to cut off her body to give the comparison a sliver of  realism. 

Nonsense, dead ringer which has been confirmed with 162 people who know you.

I’m still after a ticket for Vienna tho 👀

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1 hour ago, Jersey Jim said:

Nonsense, dead ringer which has been confirmed with 162 people who know you.

I’m still after a ticket for Vienna tho 👀

Aye ok, you’ve convinced me. Of the 163 people who know me that are looking for a ticket for Austria you are now definitely top of the list.

If there are any Audrey Fleurot fans out there with a spare ticket for Jim I can send you a signed photo  by way of thanks. Head and shoulders only though , I am not THAT convinced . 

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22 minutes ago, TDYER63 said:

Aye ok, you’ve convinced me. Of the 163 people who know me that are looking for a ticket for Austria you are now definitely top of the list.

If there are any Audrey Fleurot fans out there with a spare ticket for Jim I can send you a signed photo  by way of thanks. Head and shoulders only though , I am not THAT convinced . 

Don’t tempt me to post a photo of you so the TAMB can decide.

Nice bit of blackmail there 😂

Where’s my ticket for Vienna 

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On 6/26/2021 at 11:05 AM, TDYER63 said:

Great news Slasher. Just had STV on the phone. They want to do a dramatisation of your book, Steelmen. Sadly, Penelope Cruz is unavailable, however Kim Tate has agreed to play the part of the burd who has the affair with her husband’s colleague.

I tried to get you the part of the colleague , so long as you didnt speak, but that is still out with equity guidelines due to the size of the part.  I have however secured you a cameo role as a canteen worker. I am sure your bacon butties will find a way to her heart 😍 
 

Unsurprisingly I have given this some thought. Always fancied Natalie Robb for that part, she fairly puts it about on Emmerdale 🤣. Also fancied Martin Compston for the part of Ricky..... no sure how he'd feel about playing a Rangers fan though 🤔

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Not so much alcohol but possibly through verging on a cocoa induced coma I discovered aspects of myself I didn’t really care for whilst on a trip at Cadbury World last week.  All was going swimmingly as wandering about the place in 25 degree heat there was various aged mums in various stages of dress ranging from classic summer all the way through to it being harder to imagine what they actually looked like clothed vs naked – each to their own but when did braless become fashion especially with the more squint titted ladies!  My wife was ogling the scene as someone would a motorway accident as milk chocolatey tanned scousers and brummies with eyebrows bigger than their skirts roamed about the place feral like pole-dancing Oompa Loompas and she seemed genuinely impressed I wasn’t frothing at the mouth humping at her leg like some deranged sex pest.    

Basking in my glory and plotting how best to convert this into additional holiday sexy time I took my seat in the 4-D cinema wearing a pair of the stupid 3-D glasses  momentarily wandering what the additional dimension could possibly be.  Unfortunately things began to unravel as we docked on the Cadbury mothership where the Caramel bunny was waiting to greet us sat on the flight deck cross legged wearing nothing but a pink bow and salacious smile as she began to recite the inflight safety briefing in her overtly sexually dripping brogue.  On asking myself if I was really actually aroused by a cartoon rabbit whose sole interest in me was purely to punt confectionary I found out the additional dimension of the cinema was basically the seat violently vibrating my arse as we descended onto the Crunchie rollercoaster.  At this point my brain went all University Challenge on me whereby rather than answering the question at hand it instead basically stated ‘nominate penis!’ and on looking down it was a tail of mixed emotion.  On the one hand was relieved I wasn’t sporting an obvious overt erection in a cinema surrounded by at least three school parties whereas on the other was a bit gutted not to have to violently avert my eyes for fear of it bashing me square in the coupon potentially risking blindness.

As the seat descended back to a gentle hum I found myself contemplating whether I’d finally discovered my kink in life is violent anus shaking whilst watching retro cartoons.  I found absolutely no solace in the realisation either that at my base level I’m just an average bloke who would likely fall for 80’s style sexually targeted advertising thus making purchasing decisions purely via a stirring of my genitals.  Worse still, if I had access to one of those suits they have on ‘Ready Player One’ I’d probably have interrupted her midway through the safety briefing by bending that that fucking bunny right over the control deck feeding her Fruit Pastels round the front whilst slapping and prodding at her fluffy tailed derriere round the back with a Christmas sized tube demanding she told me she was a bad bad girl who preferred Nestle Rowntree’s products more!        

I ate the free Wispas, Dairy Milks and Curly Wurlys but the Caramels remain untouched in the fridge for fear of flashbacks.    

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On 7/14/2021 at 10:53 AM, stirlish said:

Back onto proper beer goggles.

One of the women from motherland, and Line of Duty.

Anna Maxwell Martin.

just checked her bio ... she scrubs up well!

 

 

She is a real horror in Line of Duty , she plays the part so well , but is definitely someone who can be transformed by simply playing a softer character and adding very little make up . It makes her a really versatile actress. 

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On 7/18/2021 at 9:45 AM, slasher said:

Unsurprisingly I have given this some thought. Always fancied Natalie Robb for that part, she fairly puts it about on Emmerdale 🤣. Also fancied Martin Compston for the part of Ricky..... no sure how he'd feel about playing a Rangers fan though 🤔

I definitely think Ken Loach could do something with your book 😁 Might need to change Rickys allegiance to secure Martin Compston right enough , dont think his acting skills extend to that level. 

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3 hours ago, ThistleWhistle said:

Not so much alcohol but possibly through verging on a cocoa induced coma I discovered aspects of myself I didn’t really care for whilst on a trip at Cadbury World last week.  All was going swimmingly as wandering about the place in 25 degree heat there was various aged mums in various stages of dress ranging from classic summer all the way through to it being harder to imagine what they actually looked like clothed vs naked – each to their own but when did braless become fashion especially with the more squint titted ladies!  My wife was ogling the scene as someone would a motorway accident as milk chocolatey tanned scousers and brummies with eyebrows bigger than their skirts roamed about the place feral like pole-dancing Oompa Loompas and she seemed genuinely impressed I wasn’t frothing at the mouth humping at her leg like some deranged sex pest.    

Basking in my glory and plotting how best to convert this into additional holiday sexy time I took my seat in the 4-D cinema wearing a pair of the stupid 3-D glasses  momentarily wandering what the additional dimension could possibly be.  Unfortunately things began to unravel as we docked on the Cadbury mothership where the Caramel bunny was waiting to greet us sat on the flight deck cross legged wearing nothing but a pink bow and salacious smile as she began to recite the inflight safety briefing in her overtly sexually dripping brogue.  On asking myself if I was really actually aroused by a cartoon rabbit whose sole interest in me was purely to punt confectionary I found out the additional dimension of the cinema was basically the seat violently vibrating my arse as we descended onto the Crunchie rollercoaster.  At this point my brain went all University Challenge on me whereby rather than answering the question at hand it instead basically stated ‘nominate penis!’ and on looking down it was a tail of mixed emotion.  On the one hand was relieved I wasn’t sporting an obvious overt erection in a cinema surrounded by at least three school parties whereas on the other was a bit gutted not to have to violently avert my eyes for fear of it bashing me square in the coupon potentially risking blindness.

As the seat descended back to a gentle hum I found myself contemplating whether I’d finally discovered my kink in life is violent anus shaking whilst watching retro cartoons.  I found absolutely no solace in the realisation either that at my base level I’m just an average bloke who would likely fall for 80’s style sexually targeted advertising thus making purchasing decisions purely via a stirring of my genitals.  Worse still, if I had access to one of those suits they have on ‘Ready Player One’ I’d probably have interrupted her midway through the safety briefing by bending that that fucking bunny right over the control deck feeding her Fruit Pastels round the front whilst slapping and prodding at her fluffy tailed derriere round the back with a Christmas sized tube demanding she told me she was a bad bad girl who preferred Nestle Rowntree’s products more!        

I ate the free Wispas, Dairy Milks and Curly Wurlys but the Caramels remain untouched in the fridge for fear of flashbacks.    

😂 here’s me thinking the most erotic thing about Cadbury’s is scooping a creme egg out with your tongue.  

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2 hours ago, TDYER63 said:

😂 here’s me thinking the most erotic thing about Cadbury’s is scooping a creme egg out with your tongue.  

Can’t do that if they’ve been in the fridge 

Edited by dan cake
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12 hours ago, Archiesdad said:

@TDYER63

 

That's Mrs Mitchell's new series starting on bbc2 tonight..

 

Swoon.❤️

Dammit I missed it. Will tune in next week to check out the competition in action, and try and spot an area of weakness I can capitalise on 🤔

Hope she cheered up Monday for you 😊

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10 hours ago, dan cake said:

Can’t do that if they’ve been in the fridge 

The fridge? Who puts a creme egg in the fridge and spoils that gorgeous fondant ? Were you the guy that puts jaffa cakes in the fridge too ? ( though i did try that and its not bad) 

I do agree right enough  that the fridge would spoil the allure of a creme egg. Maybe not so much with the fondant as you could just hold the tip of your tongue on it till it warmed up. But there is nothing sexy about crashing through  cold thick brittle chocolate with your gnashers.  That would spoil the moment. 
 

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Apologies Sis for coming so late to this high brow thread you have started.

Furthermore, I am utterly astounded that after a full 5 pages, this one has not been done yet……

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4 hours ago, Marky said:

Apologies Sis for coming so late to this high brow thread you have started.

Furthermore, I am utterly astounded that after a full 5 pages, this one has not been done yet……

B3276A08-5960-4175-8026-FC7F399F17B3.thumb.png.3ca379c4179d97696b0092de59f37155.png

I was hoping this thread was low brow enough to avoid anything political. Trust you to drag my thread up to wee Nic ‘s lofty height 😡

 

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