Ormond Posted April 6, 2018 Share Posted April 6, 2018 (edited) On 4/4/2018 at 11:57 AM, Big Col said: the scud book demise is one reason you see so many fat kids these days. Every chance we got as kids we were away a walk or a bike ride for miles to find an abandoned quarry, disused factory or empty building. The holy grail on these trips was finding a 2nd hand scud book. Some of our trips were like Stand By Me the movie. These days kids and their phones can have an hd quality butchers shop window pose in 2 clicks whereas the best we could get was a ripped page of a readers wife with a big hairy minge. Absolutely spot on! I miss cunts talking like this here. Edited April 6, 2018 by Ormond Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TDYER63 Posted April 7, 2018 Share Posted April 7, 2018 2 pages into a thread about childhood memories and nothing more than nudey mags 🙄 Shakes head. Not all childhood memories are good right enough. I remember being absolutely devastated when, in about p4, I failed the audition for the school brass band. The entire class got taken to the first aid room and told to stand in a queue, all you had to do to pass the audition was make a sound, any sound, from a Cornet. I was the only person in the class who couldnt get a sound. Not even a wee toot 🙁 The auditions took place in the lunch hour, so you had to bring a packed lunch. My gran had just bought me a new school bag, a tan leather briefcase, probably for getting a gold star in my jotter for the first time ever. I lived on a council estate in Paisley , all the other girls had cool Donny Osmond bags and I was walking about like the fookin chancellor of the exchequer. I opened my briefcase to take solice in my packed lunch, only to find that my lunch was banana sandwiches , and the banana had been put on the bread in the morning, so it was black and seeping all over my new bag . It was a terrible day. And the bag stank of banana for weeks 😢 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Big Col Posted April 7, 2018 Share Posted April 7, 2018 egg mayonnaise in your piece box. It was a very distinctive smell, the egg and the plastic tupperware. The whole class knew if you had an egg piece. That tracing paper stuff that they claimed was toilet paper in the school bogs. I don't think i ever took a dump at school. Building a slide in the school playground when it was frosty. Actually rushing into school early to work on the slide. I'm guessing now its a health and safety issue and slide building is banned? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TDYER63 Posted April 7, 2018 Share Posted April 7, 2018 58 minutes ago, Big Col said: egg mayonnaise in your piece box. It was a very distinctive smell, the egg and the plastic tupperware. The whole class knew if you had an egg piece. That tracing paper stuff that they claimed was toilet paper in the school bogs. I don't think i ever took a dump at school. Building a slide in the school playground when it was frosty. Actually rushing into school early to work on the slide. I'm guessing now its a health and safety issue and slide building is banned? Simply ‘rushing into school ‘ is a health and safety issue these days. 😂 egg pieces in tupperware, 40 odd years may have passed but the mere mention of it and the ‘aroma ‘ comes flooding back. You must have been posh or a bit younger than me though cos it was simply egg mashed with butter , or on a good day, mashed with salad cream. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lairdyfaeinverclyde Posted April 7, 2018 Author Share Posted April 7, 2018 I can remember how i felt standing in the headmasters office or the school corridor waiting to get the belt/strap. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bonzo Posted April 7, 2018 Share Posted April 7, 2018 2 hours ago, TDYER63 said: The auditions took place in the lunch hour, so you had to bring a packed lunch. My gran had just bought me a new school bag, a tan leather briefcase, probably for getting a gold star in my jotter for the first time ever. I lived on a council estate in Paisley , all the other girls had cool Donny Osmond bags and I was walking about like the fookin chancellor of the exchequer. Along the same lines. In primary 5 I needed football boots to go to the trials for the school team (you weren't permitted to wear trainers). Even back then childhood vanity was rife the boots had to be Adidas or gola. My mum came home with my new boots from woolworths....WOOLWORTHS winfield panthers if I recall correctly. Now I realise now that was all my auld dears could afford but that didn't matter to me at the time. I went in the mega huff "I'm no wearing them". "aye you ur"said my maw, the argument went on for days. I never wore them and never got to the trials because I wouldn't. Luckily soon after I found a scud book....... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TDYER63 Posted April 7, 2018 Share Posted April 7, 2018 30 minutes ago, bonzo said: Along the same lines. In primary 5 I needed football boots to go to the trials for the school team (you weren't permitted to wear trainers). Even back then childhood vanity was rife the boots had to be Adidas or gola. My mum came home with my new boots from woolworths....WOOLWORTHS winfield panthers if I recall correctly. Now I realise now that was all my auld dears could afford but that didn't matter to me at the time. I went in the mega huff "I'm no wearing them". "aye you ur"said my maw, the argument went on for days. I never wore them and never got to the trials because I wouldn't. Luckily soon after I found a scud book....... 😂 oh Bonzo I feel your pain, on this occasion a dirty mag is acceptable 👍. I was good at sports and was in the school netball and athletics team, but my fanily couldn't afford to buy me a real Fred Perry top flike the rest of the team had, I had to wear wee cheap nylon thing, And I had to use spikes borrowed from the school whereas everyone else had their own. The worst thing ever was though primary school leaving dance. I had to wear the long bridesmaid dress I wore when ny mum got remarried 2 years earlier . TWO years . I was about 6 inches talller by then, it was halfway up my legs. It really is surprising I have turned out so normal and balanced 😬 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grim Jim Posted April 7, 2018 Share Posted April 7, 2018 7 hours ago, Big Col said: egg mayonnaise in your piece box. It was a very distinctive smell, the egg and the plastic tupperware. The whole class knew if you had an egg piece. That tracing paper stuff that they claimed was toilet paper in the school bogs. I don't think i ever took a dump at school. Building a slide in the school playground when it was frosty. Actually rushing into school early to work on the slide. I'm guessing now its a health and safety issue and slide building is banned? Ditto! Not just because of the Izel ether. There was a wee guy who could pish way higher than the cubicle walls. (No pun intended.) There might have been a bit of health and safety back in my day; though only once the slide had been polished the full length of the playground, the soddin' jannie would come out and salt it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grim Jim Posted April 7, 2018 Share Posted April 7, 2018 5 hours ago, TDYER63 said: 😂 oh Bonzo I feel your pain, on this occasion a dirty mag is acceptable 👍. I was good at sports and was in the school netball and athletics team, but my fanily couldn't afford to buy me a real Fred Perry top flike the rest of the team had, I had to wear wee cheap nylon thing, And I had to use spikes borrowed from the school whereas everyone else had their own. The worst thing ever was though primary school leaving dance. I had to wear the long bridesmaid dress I wore when ny mum got remarried 2 years earlier . TWO years . I was about 6 inches talller by then, it was halfway up my legs. It really is surprising I have turned out so normal and balanced 😬 Oh no you haven't. There's another slip Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slasher Posted April 7, 2018 Share Posted April 7, 2018 (edited) Catching bees in a jam jar 👍 Some eco warrior wid probably have you up on a charge these days. Edited April 7, 2018 by slasher Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fringo Posted April 7, 2018 Share Posted April 7, 2018 8 hours ago, TDYER63 said: 2 pages into a thread about childhood memories and nothing more than nudey mags 🙄 Shakes head. Not all childhood memories are good right enough. I remember being absolutely devastated when, in about p4, I failed the audition for the school brass band. The entire class got taken to the first aid room and told to stand in a queue, all you had to do to pass the audition was make a sound, any sound, from a Cornet. I was the only person in the class who couldnt get a sound. Not even a wee toot 🙁 The auditions took place in the lunch hour, so you had to bring a packed lunch. My gran had just bought me a new school bag, a tan leather briefcase, probably for getting a gold star in my jotter for the first time ever. I lived on a council estate in Paisley , all the other girls had cool Donny Osmond bags and I was walking about like the fookin chancellor of the exchequer. I opened my briefcase to take solice in my packed lunch, only to find that my lunch was banana sandwiches , and the banana had been put on the bread in the morning, so it was black and seeping all over my new bag . It was a terrible day. And the bag stank of banana for weeks 😢 That has to be the oxymoron of the year so far on the TAMB Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jersey Jim Posted April 8, 2018 Share Posted April 8, 2018 16 hours ago, TDYER63 said: 😂 oh Bonzo I feel your pain, on this occasion a dirty mag is acceptable 👍. I was good at sports and was in the school netball and athletics team, but my fanily couldn't afford to buy me a real Fred Perry top flike the rest of the team had, I had to wear wee cheap nylon thing, And I had to use spikes borrowed from the school whereas everyone else had their own. The worst thing ever was though primary school leaving dance. I had to wear the long bridesmaid dress I wore when ny mum got remarried 2 years earlier . TWO years . I was about 6 inches talller by then, it was halfway up my legs. It really is surprising I have turned out so normal and balanced 😬 MMMmm. You think? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teecee- Posted April 8, 2018 Share Posted April 8, 2018 Pitch and Putt and the Boating Pond at Rouken Glen park was part of my childhood enjoyment. Walking from my Council House to this posh area left me wondering how do you get a hoose here? Still wondering. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TDYER63 Posted April 8, 2018 Share Posted April 8, 2018 11 hours ago, Grim Jim said: Oh no you haven't. There's another slip 🙂 Well if I havent it may be because, not only did I have to wear a bridesmaid dress that was 2 years old, the guy that was taking me to the dance dumped me the night before. And I am going to name and shame him right now, It could be you. His name was Jim Brown , so if you are out there, Jim Brown from Paisley circa 1974, I havny forgotten 👨🔨 😡 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TDYER63 Posted April 8, 2018 Share Posted April 8, 2018 11 hours ago, fringo said: That has to be the oxymoron of the year so far on the TAMB Dont dare dis The Donny 🤨 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TDYER63 Posted April 8, 2018 Share Posted April 8, 2018 (edited) @Jersey Jim Aye, well as they say, it takes one to know one 😉 You having to wait a bit longer for the Mighty Murren to wrap up the league ? Edited April 8, 2018 by TDYER63 No quote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fringo Posted April 8, 2018 Share Posted April 8, 2018 1 hour ago, TDYER63 said: Dont dare dis The Donny 🤨 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bonzo Posted April 8, 2018 Share Posted April 8, 2018 1 hour ago, TDYER63 said: Dont dare dis The Donald 🤨 We know what you were really thinking Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TDYER63 Posted April 8, 2018 Share Posted April 8, 2018 31 minutes ago, bonzo said: We know what you were really thinking 😂, I may not be as balanced as I like to think I am but I am not THAT unstable. On the other hand , The Donald is probably still behind Jim Brown in the list of folk I would like to shoot, and just ahead of Orraloon . The German Orraloon of course 😬 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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