killiefaetheferry Posted January 19, 2018 Share Posted January 19, 2018 Jeez, it's another one of those place of conception names eh ? Like 'Brooklyn'. My mate brought a dinner party to a spluttering, howling halt when he said to his Mrs about this subject...."We should have called Charlotte...'lay-by on the A9 then, eh ?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DoonTheSlope Posted January 19, 2018 Author Share Posted January 19, 2018 10 minutes ago, Ormond said: My best mate here is black and he’s forever laughing about feeling left out as his name is a boring Freddie. What would he like to have been called? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ormond Posted January 19, 2018 Share Posted January 19, 2018 1 minute ago, DoonTheSlope said: What would he like to have been called? He’s a top shagger and smooth as fuck. So I’ve nicknamed him Shaft. I’ll play the Shaft theme tune on the Juke box when he comes in the boozer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DoonTheSlope Posted January 19, 2018 Author Share Posted January 19, 2018 5 minutes ago, Ormond said: He’s a top shagger and smooth as fuck. So I’ve nicknamed him Shaft. I’ll play the Shaft theme tune on the Juke box when he comes in the boozer. You should bring him along to an away trip Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ormond Posted January 19, 2018 Share Posted January 19, 2018 Just now, DoonTheSlope said: You should bring him along to an away trip He’s a right good looking cunt. He’d probably do those Swedish tarts all at the same time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fringo Posted January 19, 2018 Share Posted January 19, 2018 10 minutes ago, Ormond said: He’s a top shagger and smooth as fuck. So I’ve nicknamed him Shaft. I’ll play the Shaft theme tune on the Juke box when he comes in the boozer. 1 minute ago, Ormond said: He’s a right good looking cunt. He’d probably do those Swedish tarts all at the same time. You really need to wash your mouth out with soap or get your wife to do it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ormond Posted January 19, 2018 Share Posted January 19, 2018 Just now, fringo said: You really need to wash your mouth out with soap or get your wife to do it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DoonTheSlope Posted January 19, 2018 Author Share Posted January 19, 2018 (edited) 8 minutes ago, Ormond said: He’s a right good looking cunt. He’d probably do those Swedish tarts all at the same time. In Ljubljana I thought I was in with some tidy wee Austrian thing. Blethering away for ages and had a couple of drinks. She said to me "We better go now" I thought I my patter had paid off then she cuddled me turned around then fucked off with her boyfriend Edited January 19, 2018 by DoonTheSlope Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ormond Posted January 19, 2018 Share Posted January 19, 2018 Just now, DoonTheSlope said: In Ljubljana I thought I was in with some Austrian thing. Blethering away for ages and had a couple of drinks. She said to me "We better go now" I thought I my patter had paid off then she cuddled me turned around then fucked off with her boyfriend Let’s be honest here. Euro chicks know we are ugly bastards compared to those fit, handsome Euro men. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DoonTheSlope Posted January 19, 2018 Author Share Posted January 19, 2018 1 minute ago, Ormond said: Let’s be honest here. Euro chicks know we are ugly bastards compared to those fit, handsome Euro men. We might not have the length or girth but the Scottish cuisine means we've got a good 13-14stone to push it in wi Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ormond Posted January 19, 2018 Share Posted January 19, 2018 Just now, DoonTheSlope said: We might not have the length or girth but the Scottish cuisine means we've got a good 13-14stone to push it in wi Fly to the US and you’ll be a skinny hoor. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DoonTheSlope Posted January 19, 2018 Author Share Posted January 19, 2018 1 minute ago, Ormond said: Fly to the US and you’ll be a skinny hoor. Naibdy wants to shag an ironing board! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fringo Posted January 19, 2018 Share Posted January 19, 2018 4 minutes ago, DoonTheSlope said: We might not have the length or girth but the Scottish cuisine means we've got a good 13-14stone to push it in wi 1 minute ago, DoonTheSlope said: Naibdy wants to shag an ironing board! And you too should wash your mouth out or ask Ormond's wife to do it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DoonTheSlope Posted January 19, 2018 Author Share Posted January 19, 2018 Just now, fringo said: And you too should wash your mouth out or ask Ormond's wife to do it. I thought I was gonnae huv'ty in Ljubljana Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phart Posted January 20, 2018 Share Posted January 20, 2018 8 hours ago, Ormond said: . I’ll play the Shaft theme tune on the Juke box when he comes in the boozer. You've mentioned that juke box a few times now sir. You'll have to stop it now, you know the TAMB rules... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bonzo Posted January 20, 2018 Share Posted January 20, 2018 10 hours ago, DoonTheSlope said: Naibdy wants to shag an ironing board! What about on an ironing board? https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Malibu Wave Rider Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TDYER63 Posted January 20, 2018 Share Posted January 20, 2018 2 hours ago, bonzo said: What about on an ironing board? https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Malibu Wave Rider Just before the man "hits the big wave", he must jump up and stand on top of the woman, as if riding a surf board, and yell "cowabunga!", 😂😂😂 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ormond Posted January 20, 2018 Share Posted January 20, 2018 10 hours ago, phart said: You've mentioned that juke box a few times now sir. You'll have to stop it now, you know the TAMB rules... https://youtu.be/cEaRCAcfOEQ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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